Of All The Idiotic Things You Could Do With Your Life,
This Could Be One Of Them!
|OUR STANDARDS ARE LOW. YOU MAY FIT RIGHT IN.
|People Are Just Dying To Work Here, Or Something Like That
We go through hundreds of employees every day... uh, that is, we
are always hiring! If you are dumb enough or somehow remotely interested in a career at The Center
for Cretaceous Studies or Cretaceousland! simply print out,
fill out, and mail in the employment application below. When the C4CS Human Resources receives your app, we'll call you within
24 hours. [this will give you enough time to sober up]
The Center for Cretaceous Studies Employment Application
City, Town, Village, State, Province, Territory, Island ___________
Numbers (like, phone, social security, license plate) ___________
Next Of Kin __________________________________________________
List Previous Experience Working With Live Dinosaurs:
When Is The Best Time To Contact You?
Why Is That?
List Allergies In Numerical Order:
Are You Allergic To Dinosaur Bites?
Do You Really Need Both Legs To Run?
If A Woodchuck Could Chuck Wood, How Much Wood Would A Woodchuck Chuck?
(show your work)
How Many Feet Are In A Leap Year?
Do You Have Dependable Transportation? Y N
If Yes, Can I Get A Ride Home After Work?
What Is Your Best Time In The 100-Meter?
Do Any Of Your Hobbies Include Screaming?
On A Scale Of 1 To 2, How Would You Rate Your Personal Hygiene?
What Is The Next Number In This Sequence: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7....
Finish This Sentence: "The....."
Kan You Spell Good?
Who Was Your Favorite Star Trek Captain?
Really? Are You Kidding?
What Kind Of Medication Are You Currently Taking (while filling out this application)?
Do You Share?
Have You Ever Had Any Appendages Removed By A Dinosaur?
Was It On Purpose?
Have You Ever Been Convicted Of Anything?
Would You Like To Be?