for CRETACEOUS STUDIES
THE WORLD LEADER IN LIVE
And All The Crap Associated With Them
|BOARD OF DIRECTORS TO SHUT DOWN C4CS NIGHTCLUB
|"Too Many Employees Going In, Not Enough Coming Out"
PROUD MEMBER OF THE MID-AMERICA PALEONTOLOGY SOCIETY
even though they asked us to go away
THE CENTER FOR CRETACEOUS STUDIES
you kidding? how'd THAT happen?!?
Look For CEO, Founder, DR. S BECKMANN On LinkedIn
seriously, why would you do that?
|Charter Member of People for the Ethical Treatment of Dinosaurs Since Last Week
the Center for Cretaceous Studies [C4CS] LIVE Dinosaur research institution website.
The animals [that is, the Dinosaurs, not the staff], are back indoors here in the warm, friendly confines of their Indoor
Paddocks [IPs], of which you are more than welcome to walk around inside and experience these gentle, loving, man-eaters,
up close and personal!
Here at the Center for Cretaceous Studies we often research and sometimes study
the unstudied and unresearched aspects of Dinosaur life, both past and present. That is, when we're not attending the funerals
of those doing that unstudied and unresearched stuff. However, as the ONLY research institute in the world with eating,
biting, living, biting, breathing, biting, carnivorous Dinosaurs from the Cretaceous Period [wait, did we mention biting?], we have live examples just down
the hall, so eh, what do we care if we discover something in fossils or not?
Our record is incomparable to any other live Dinosaur research institute on Earth. Not because our "residents" are actually
live, meat-eating Dinosaurs, but mostly because we are the only ones stupid enough to house live, meat-eating Dinosaurs. You're
sure we mentioned "biting", right?
Our unofficial motto: "Museums Are Nice, But We Have Them LIVE", remains our unofficial motto to this
day, mostly because we don't want to be sued by Universal Studios or that Spielberg guy. Then again we thought it was slightly
better than our previous motto: "You're Probably Going To Die Here".
Set on a gorgeous college campus-like setting, our Dinosaur research facility would be on the cover of Better Homes & Gardens
if not for the... well, you-know-what's. This research institution, located southwest of Chicago, Illinois, is home to over
158 species* - we think - and probably growing every year, for all we know.
*Note: Most of our DinoCensus volunteers have never returned, so we're kinda guessing
site on your Favorites or Bucket List as company news and information [below] is updated nearly every weekend - or as long
as someone is still around [alive] to write.
You don't want to miss any of the 'adventures'... specially if for some insane reason you actually plan to visit us
some day. Thanks for looking, and we hope to see you here soon!
Proof of life insurance, next of kin contact information, and blood type on separate piece
of paper [in case the original is eaten] are required before admission will be granted.
|CEO DR. BECKMANN RUINS ANOTHER COUPLE DINODIGS
|Over The Years Dr. Beckmann Has Dug Up Many Ounces Of Bones- Some Of Them Belong To Dinosaurs!
| THE WEEK IN REVIEW BUZZ
QUESTIONABLE FACTS, INNUENDO, HINTS,
NEWS, RUMORS AND GOSSIP...
ok, mostly just rumors and gossip,
DIRECT FROM tC4CS WATER COOLER
LAST UPDATED 5 NOVEMBER 2018 A.D.
AKA: 66,005,323 YEARS AFTER "THE ANCIENTS" KICKED THE BUCKET
CEO SAYS HE FEELS MOST SUPERVISORS WILL BE ELECTED
He's Been Wrong Before, Says Just About Everyone
The Center for Cretaceous Studies CEO and founder, Dr. S Beckmann, appearing at election-eve rallies in Building G and E,
argued Monday that voters are energized heading into Tuesday’s vote, saying he hasn’t felt such “electricity”
since he tried to tune his radio while taking a bath.
"Tomorrow, with your votes, you can elect people who, for some unknown reason, want to supervise your Indoor Paddocks,
your outdoor Habitats," Dr. Beckmann told the crowd in Building E.
He added, “Tuesday is your chance to send a message to everyone who has made it their mission to lead The Center
into the future. I just wish I knew what that message was."
On the day before both The Center and Cretaceousland! vote for IP [Indoor Paddock] and HAB [Habitat] supervisors, the CEO
is hopscotching to rallies in three battleground areas -- buildings G, E, and W – as many incumbent supervisors aim
to win once agai... oh, who are we kidding? Of those elected Supervisor during the last elections, only 3 survive. All three
are currently in the ICU at CFI Care hospital.
“There is something going on,” the CEO said at one point. “There is an electricity like people
have not seen since 2016 November when we went from manual to electronic gate locks in all buildings across the campus.”
In Building G, Dr. Beckmann campaigned for a slate of supervisors, including Amanda Livering Kohl, Lou Segusi, and April Lynne
Parris. The CEO railed against former IP64 Supervisor Evan Elpus as a “far-left radical socialist pig,” “not
a good person” and yet “we miss him terribly since he was reported MPE [Missing, Presumed Eaten]
a week after the elections.”
Dr. Beckmann will continue to visit and campaign for the supervisor elections until next week, even though voting takes place
on Tuesday. We guess he has nothing better to do.
Read The REAL Story: Trump says he feels GOP electricity in Ohio, Indiana election-eve rallies
HERE IT IS!!!
GET THE INSIDE STORY OF THE CENTER
FOR CRETACEOUS STUDIES!!
Most Likely THE BEST Live Dinosaur Research Institution Book Every
Written Without Typohs
NOW you can get your paperback or eBook, the aptly titled The Center for Cretaceous Studies from AuthorHouse, Amazon,
or Barnes & Noble! If you're on this site then we're pretty sure you know what kind of book to expect.
Where can you get it? Search no more!
An eBook is available exclusively from the AuthorHouse site. The paperback only is for sale online from the fine bookstores
listed below. Just type in 'Center for Cretaceous Studies' when you get there:
AuthorHouse (eBook and paperback)
Barnes & Noble
THE CRETACEOUSLAND! LINK (CLICK HERE)!
NO! WAIT!!! CLICK HERE TO RETURN TO C4CS PREVIEW PAGE
CLICK HERE TO RETURN TO TOP OF PAGE
A division of Beckmann Scientific [BS]